Making a trip to hospital during CNY isn't that auspicious huh?

Met him at Sembawang MRT and we went TTSH, visited Steph.I messaged her earlier that I wouldn't be visiting her today as I promised the day before.She sounded a bit disappointed.

A surprise for her. :))))

Reached TTSH around 3, went up to her ward and realised that the door was locked.Damnit.The surprise was some sort spoiled as I need to call her and get her to open the door for me and him.We went to the lounge and chatted for a while.My stomach was "playing drums" and we headed down to have our lunch.Chatted happily as we ate and went up to her ward again.I teached her how to do her maths homework but I forgot everything that my teachers taught me in school so I couldn't help her much.Managed to solve almost none of them.Pro huh?? He was sleeping at the side of the bed and Steph and me were like laughing at him.

Around 6 plus, Fiona and Faris came and it was their turn to accompany her so me and him made a move first.

We went to Plaza Sing as he needs to give his MC to store so I waited for him outside 7-eleven.Yani came up and found me.Chatted for a while and she went down again.

Me and him bused back to Sembawang and he accompanied me home to take money for my dinner from my parents.Had my dinner and sent him back to Sembawang MRT station and headed home after that.

Fen came my house around 12 plus and stayed at my house around 2 plus and she went back.

Meeting Fiona, Sharon Yap and Fen at 2 tomorrow, gotta somethings for my school stuffs and gotta reach home early for dinner tomorrow.


i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

I'm so god damn happy today.I'm posted to NYP Nursing Course today!! I got the message from MOE, telling me that I'm posted there!! I'm so happy!! Finally, after 2 years of non-stop working, I got the chance to study!! Can't wait to start school now, images of studying life kept flooding my mind.Can't wait for school to start.Excited!!!

B***H and "hantu hitam" talked to me today, regarding my absence from work without valid reasons and me smoking with Yani at back door, leaving our stations unattended.B***H told me that I have attitude problems and I'm not matured enough.I may be 19 years old but my thinking still stuck at 15 years old.It's like what the f**k??!! She doesn't understand me well, or, should I say, she doesn't even bother to understand me, and she starts making personal statements about me.She went around telling people that I'm a gangster and ruined my reputation.She just sucks to the core.I hate her.She always demoralize me in front of many people and make me lose face.So she needs us to give her face but we don't need? We are humans too, we have emotions, not just her.When she needs you she will talk nicely, but when she doesn't, she will shout at you like nobody's business.She kept asking me whether I'm still interested in working in this store, and said that she would rather transfer me to Heeren than keeping me in her store.All the words she used made me felt that she doesn't want me in the store and get rid of me.What I hate the most was when she mentioned the incident about "idiot".Obvious that she's siding them and thinks that I'm bullying them.She told me that different people have different ways of interpreting things, and my body language shows that I'm not friendly and I'm a bad person.

But this is who I am.I don't respect people when they don't respect me.If I let them step over my head, they would think that I'm a idiot who let people bully.I will not change because of them.This is me, and this is Singapore.If you are not happy then get your smelly ass out of here.We don't need such people like you here.B***H said that she would talk to them but, I don't see her taking any actions against them? I only knew they kept pointing their fingers towards me and this is what I called, FAVOURITISM.F**king hell.


When talking to them, I neither feel remorseful nor angry.I felt numb inside as I've already given up on this store.I would usually cry or felt down after they've "counselled" me.But today, NO.I've decided at the point of time when I knew of the news that I'm posted, nothing could spoil my day today.Today is the day when I'm freed of all the sufferings I have these 2 years and today is the start of my studying life.When I signed that violation letter, I felt happy.B***H made me write a performance review, promising tha I will improve on my punctuality, woork attitude and never NO SHOW again without notifying the shift manager.I just quickly wrote that and I punched out.

Went up to meet Fiona and Yani, bought some bubble tea and tako yaki balls.Happily chatting away and went home around 11.Met Ben on my way home and chatted with him too, under my block.Reached home around 1 and here I am, to blog.

Tomorrow gotta visit Steph, with him, so have to sleep early.Nights, peeps.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Went out with Yani today.She wanted me to accompany her so since I'm not going with him and his relatives so why not? Met her at Orchard MRT and we walked to Far East Plaza.Have our lunch there and did some window shopping.

Bused down to Suntec City, window shopping again.As I'm in kinda in-a-shopping mood, Fen called me and told me to tell Fiona that she could not accomdate her last minute arrangement.Found out that she did not bring her phone out cause she lend it to her "useless" boyfriend.Stephanie msged me and asked me whether her sister is with a not.

Why the hell should Fiona be with me??

Stephanie was admitted to hospital due to her suspected case of Dengue Fever.Then Fen called to ask whether I wanted to pay a visit to her and I agreed.So Yani and me waited for her to drive down.

Upon reaching TTSH, we asked the Mum where is she but her Mum told us is at level 2, which in the fact is, A&E department.We stayed there for near to 1 hour but had no news.Her Mum went to work.Luckily a staff nurse there was friendly enough to helped us find out what is going inside.Only 2 registered people can enter and we couldn't rely on her sister as she's unable dig out the problem.We were worried and frantically trying to find out what's wrong.The staff nurse told us that she was confirmed to admit but the time was unknown.That eased our mind a little and we talked to Fiona.



i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Woke up damn early today, 10!! Prepared myself and went to tmac's house for Chinese New Year.Reached Buangkok around 12 and we walked all the way to his house.


His family was all at home and I'm shy.We took his dog called "Xiao Bai" for a walk downstairs and it seems to be so happy and excited.It was like jumping and sniffing around.Mybe it's because tmac rarely take it for a walk.

So, "Xiao Bai", you're lucky today.With me you could go downstairs and breathe the fresh air outside.Wahaha!!

After that, I went to play Audition as visitors started flooding his house.Some of them came in his room and watched me play Audition.Stress!! I only said Hi to them and that's it.I was shy.Anti-social, I should say.Around 2 plus, Fiona called me and I went to fetch her at Buangkok MRT.I almost got lost but still managed to find my way, thanks to a auntie who passionately showed me the way.Met her and we walked all the way back again.

At his house, the both of us were shy so we played Audition to keep ourselves busy and entertained.Around evening, went to play pool with tmac, his friend and the friend's girlfriend and Fiona.Played at Hougang Green and quite enjoyable.

Soon after, we parted our ways and his Dad drove us to meet Fen at Houngang Plaza, went for some snacks and Fiona went home.We drove down to Bishan Junction8 to catch "The Wedding Game".Enjoyed the movie, loads of laughter and the show ended at 11.30, which lasted for 2 hours.She drove me home and I'm damn tired now, active for 13 hours.

I called him just now and he said that he will be bringing his relatives for a tour tomorrow, which was supposed to be during March.I was thinking whether to join him or not? Whether to go work or go out with Yani? Confused.I thought that this would be the best time to leave Mac now and be gone forever, but I'm afriad that I can't clear all my annual leave.

Aarrgghh, confused.

Pondering pondering pondering.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Woke up at 1 today.Dad cooked my favourite shark fin's soup gor the whole family!! I drank 2 big bowls and I'm full.

Miracle, Li Hia can be full so easily huh?!

Went to Plaza Sing after that, met up with Fiona and went in Istana as today is their open house.Queued up for like half an hour before we could get in.Inside was a very very HUGE patch of grass and ponds.We saw the President and the Lady.The Lady looks like one old kind woman with gracefulness on her face.Inside was so huge that we were perspiring like water tap flowing.There were perfomances like liondance, gymnastics, chinese orchestra and wushu.We stood under the sun and watched all these performances.
This is so called the "Main Building" inside Istana.I think those Presidents and Prime Ministers from other countries hold their meetings here.

After that went to Party World with Fiona, which was a very last minute thing, as we wanted to watch movie in the first place.

Sang halfway, Steph called and came.She actually wanted to go home and rush her homework in the end she still came.

"Don't be upset aand disappointed.We didn't mean it.We don't want to disturb people who has to visit relatives.Normal days we will sure call you out, no worries.I'll make sure that you will be scared to answer our call!! Ha!!"

After singing till 10, went to Cineleisure to have our dinner at Burger King and went home.

Reached home about 11 plus and now I'm here to blog.

His auntie will be coming to Singapore and tour around and he said that he wanted to bring me along, I'm a bit nervous.Aarrgghh.

I'm scared, posting results will be out on 30 Jan.I'm afraid I can't get in the school again and let my parents down.

God, please let me study this year.I'm sick of working.I just wants to be a normal 19 year old kid who has to bury in books when exams time are near and hear teachers' naggings.I'm sick of being an adult who has so many responsibilities to take care of.

Please, I'm serious to study.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Today is Chinese New Year!! But I don't feel anything special about this celebration? It's just like a normal off day to me.My relatives are all in other countries and some I didn't even seen before.So...boring.

Had lunch with family in the afternoon.After that watched programmes on television with them.My auntie had to go join her friends for a mahjong session so she left early.Dad and I decided to go catch a movie at AMK Hub so three of us cabbed down.

We asked about the tickets but it was full house.

God damn it.I thought people are supposed to go "bai nian", and not watch movie?

So we headed down to Jubilee and thank goodness, there's loads of empty seats so we watched "Love Matters".

Good show.Talks about betrayal, cheats, sex and marriage.Should go watch it, makes you laugh and cry at the same time.

After that went back to AMK Hub to get a new phone for Dad.His phone is dying soon.His charger just exploded this morning.

How the hell that could happen?

Missed him, as usual.He asked me to help him ask "hantu hitam" whether he could work on this coming Saturday.Chatted on the phone and he went to sleep after that.

Last but not least,


i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Slept till 4 plus today, forced to wake up by Dad.Damn tired, but still managed to wake up in time to eat my reunion dinner with my family.

I loved reunion dinner.Great food.But this year's not that good.We ate fish steamboat, which I don't quite like it.

I hate to eat fish.Aarrgghh...Nothing for me to cook and play.Boring.

Went to cycle with my childhood friends, Christine and Christina(they are twins).Went around Sembawang estate.After that gambled poker cards with them.Actually lost about $4 plus in Black Jack.Won it back at Big 2, still managed to earn $0.60.Not bad not bad.Woohoo..!

Tomorrow's Lunar New Year!! But for me Lunar New Year is still the same like normal days.No relatives in Singapore and no place to go to.Which means, less ANG BAO.

Nevermind, used to it.

Going to watch "Love Matters" with Dad and Mum tomorrow.First time watching movies with the both of them, excited.

I called him around 8 plus at night, the voice that I missed so much.His smile is fading in my mind.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Went to play pool in the afternoon, and went to help out my Dad at his workplace.Damn loads of aunties and uncles there wanting to buy from my Dad, seems like they are the regular customers there.

Being with him half a day there made me noticed that my Dad actually is quite well-liked there.Everybody there calls him "Uncle" and all said that my Dad is nice to get along with.

That made my mind rest in peace, at least when he has problems there they will help him.

Tomorrow is New Year's eve!! Can't wait for the reunion dinner!! Food!! That's the best day I likes for the whole year round.That's the only 1 day where my family could sit down together and enjoy good food together.

After eve, BORING.

Today's the 2nd day without him, kinda missed him too.He mgsed me in the afternoon and said that he would change.That itself has already made me happy for the whole day.

See how easily satisfied am I?! Don't take advantage okay?!

Just Kidding.

:)

Wonder would he take out a day to accompany me?

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

The first day without him.

Totally bored.

Missed his voice, his teasing and his eyes.

He called me at night, but it's around 3 plus when he's gonna sleep soon.

And I was right, I WAS the last thing on his mind.He told me what he did for the whole day today but I wasn't listening that much.I longed for his voice ringing in my ears for the whole day yet when he called me I wasn't even close to happy at all.I couldn't explain why I was behaving in this way but I can't control it and feeling disappointed.

In a good way, my voice was the last thing he heard for the day.

And the bad way, I wasn't the first thing he thought of in the morning.

Kinda sad and disappointed.I rather he don't contact me for the rest of the week and even if I die, he won't even know.He might just think that I didn't picked up his call that's all.

But I wanted him to call me everyday and tells me what did he do and missed me anot.

I'm feeling so confused right now, I don't even know what I want.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Went out today to get some Lunar New Year clothes.He came my house to take a look at Fiona and my "masterpiece" and waited for me to get prepared.Went out about 1 plus and ate our lunch at Upper Thomson Road.

Wanted to go to Bugis Street to look around but headed for Far East Plaza instead.We browsed through and I went in this shop called "Beyonce".The clothes sold there were awesome!! Girls out there should take a look.The designs were unique and suited for people like me!! I went in and found a piece I landed my eyes on when I entered and went to try.

Doesn't turn out the way I wanted.

So, the shop assistance there kept looking among their clothings and took all those suitable for me to wear.

So there goes a non-stop trying of clothes.

Finally, I found 2 that I liked but don't know which to choose.

In the end, bought the piece that could be worn as a dress or top.This that I chose was quite ruggard-looking and it costs $44, after 10% discount, $39.60.

Great, now I have something to wear during CNY.

Went to meet Fen and Fiona at Plaza Singapura to enquire about something and went to Chomp Chomp to have our dinner.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Didn't turn up for work today, stayed st home for the whole day and finish up painting my room.

And, TA-Da!!! My brand new room with my favourite colour, baby blue!!


Nice, isn't it? Painted the whole room with Fiona.She came my house in the morning and we went to Sembawang Shopping Centre.We had our "lunch" there and went to buysome essentials and proceeded back home to paint.

We were enjoying painting and listening to music played from my lappy when her "DEAR" called and asked her to go buy her lappy with him.I wasn't angry at first but he insisted on her accompanying him and I got no choice but to let her go.She doesn't want to go but I kept on pushing her go.I don't want to be demanding as I asked her for her help and when she has something on and has to go.I'm in no place to keep her and she don't have the responsibility to help me finish.What triggered my anger within was when her "DEAR" said that I asked her for help and she helped me, but when I was having fun I didn't call her.

F**k this "gu niang".

When I pushed her out to the door, I was controlling my tears.As she left, my tears dropped.I don't know when I was crying but tears kept flowing down uncontrollably.I wanted to hear his voice so much at this point of time, thinking that his voice is my "sadness remedy", so I called him.We chatted for a while and he has to work.Called Fen after that, thinking that she could maybe helped me out a bit as there's too much to finish by myself, but, she's busy, so, truth is, I have to finish up everything up by myself.

Fiona msged me and told me she would be coming back.So she came back around 8 plus and we finished up around 10.Was secretly glad that she came back.Fen came around this time and helped me painted my door too.

Thanks to Fiona and Hui Fen.

I simply love my room now!!

But, the result of having such a nice room........




Bruises on my leg!!

Cause: Leaning on the ladder too long
Reason: Too short to reach


i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Went to work today, was only late for a few minutes, miracle right?! Was qutie in a good mood and slacking once I punched in.Washing the slots, smoking and having fun here and there.Loads of us were doing housekeeping for the store, including Fiona.She's cleaning the cabinets at counter front.Half of her body were inside and I was wondering whether she could stuff herself inside.So she shoved herself inside the cabinet and truth is, she really could stuff herself inside!! I closed the door and refused to let her come out and she kept banging and banging the door.Everybody was laughing and I called "hantu hitam" to come and take a look, bluffing him that there's a huge rat in the store.He ran out frantically, only to find out that it's only Fiona, locked inside the cabinet.We laughed harder!!

During my break I was chatting happily with Fiona and Jason when this "idiot" came in the crew room with a banana in her hand.That makes Fiona thought of a dirty movie she watched and told me and Jason about it.Then that "idiot" thought that we were making fun, or should I say, "insulting" her, as we spoke in english and she doesn't understand it.She went to complained to "potato", and he came to talk to me about her.Come on, we really wasn't talking about her?! She sounded so "pathetic" to "potato", saying that she only came here just to make a living and don't want any trouble here, whereas she's like bloody creating trouble for us, especially me?! She's holding a grudge on me and I've already avoided talking to her, only when necessary during work.She told "potato" that if I did it again she will report it to the headquarters and let them take actions against me.

I'm not scared of the headquarters, I'm not in the wrong, try me.I will get your ass out of PS whenever I get the chance.

When "potato" told me what she said to them I was so angry that I wanted to cry.I was already shaking in anger and almost wanted to run out and ask her what's her problem with me.I'm not a person who looks down on people who leaves their hometown and come into a foreign place to make a living for themselves and their family.I holds respect for them, as I couldn't and don't dare to leave for a foreign to live in.That "idiot" left me felt so disgusted for China women, thinking that most are them are like that.But looking back, TH and the others were different, they hold respect for other people and worked hard without having any troubles with the crews in store.I can see that most of the guys in store no doubt hate her, avoiding her when they can."Potato" asked me to grow up and tolerate her nonsense.Please la "potato", it's not that I can't tolerate her, it's just that I've already tolerated her for many occasions.Tolerance has its limits, and mine already reached it's maximum.

So, don't make me lose my cool and rant at you, you "idiot".

Enough of her.Sick and tired of looking at her face everyday.

Went home at 10 and reached home at 11 plus.Painted my bedroom door and the whole room smells of paint.

*puke

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Time now, 2am, and I just finished painting and got a chance to bathe bofore I started to post this entry.Stayed at home and painted for the whole day, and oh my god, my body's aching all over.
Met up with Fiona at Sun Plaza and went to get rollers the hardware shop near SSC.She has to walked all the way from Sun Plaza to SSC, treat it as a exercise for her.Oops, sorry Sis.Ha!!

Once we got home we started right away, watching televisions, listening to songs and chatting while our hands move up and down.I realised that I can't use rollers, looks ugly when I'm using rollers, so brushing on the paint with a brush seems to be the best solution for me.

Then Fen came and helped me too.She cleared out ALMOST everything in my room and threw away 2 big bags for junks from my room, which look so freaking empty right now.I think she got a good time with throwing my things, ha!!

While cleaning up my room, Fen accidentally broke the wax hand I made when I went Genting with Dad.OMG, damn heart pain.So now she owes me a wax hand figurine, wahaha!!

My messy dressing table, completes with all the necessities that I need everyday but thrown here and there.Couldn't even find an empty space to put anything anymore.And the drawers inside, more messy, that's why I never took a photo and post it, too embarrassing.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Worked again today, but I wasn't late, surprised huh?! Met him in the morning and had breakfast, and went to work together.Was feeling quite happy actually, b***h didn't sclod me today, she was too busy with her own things to bother about me, yes!! Finally she didn't scold me for once when she's on shift!!

Did kitchen for the whole day.Tony came to work today.He's now almost bald!! And he looks sort of cute, I like touching his hair, so soft and silky.Rarely guys' hair is like that.I kept on asking him to take off his cap and let me touch his hair.Don't call me a pervert okay!! And he complained to me that he has to spend this year's Lunar New Year with no hair, I was like laughing my head off!! So hair means so much to him, now do I realised that, after being brothers with him for so long!! He's now in this government school, studying how to dismantle machines and putting them back.The whole school's is flooded with malays and he told me the ratio of malays to chinese is like 500:16.So I was like so shocked!! So many malays!! Hopes that he can learn many things out of there.

Jie-ke pissed me off today, which is like the first time after being brothers so long with him too.I was shocked when he shouted at me when we worked kitchen and made it looks like I don't have what it takes to be a good and fast assembler.He just some sort like "snatches" my station away from me and so I have to take over his grill station.WTH?! Doesn't he already knows how I work in store? I told him about it as he noticed that I was emo-ing and he went to tell Jie-Ke and Tony.I was so pissed off with him that I requested break from "potato" although I was not hungry at all.I sat at the back door and heard the 3 guys' conversation.Jie-Ke was like complaining this is the way he talks and if I wanted to throw my temper around, it was none of his control.I was like fuming mad and I wanted to shout back at him and told him that his attitude was pissing the hell out of me.But I swallowed everything down and instead of shouting, tears started welling in my eyes.If it was the old Li Hia, I've already started shouting and throwing things around.Guessed that I'm just like that, crying when I'm angry.Stupid right?

Will stay at home tomorrow to do painting in my house, and Fiona's coming over to help me.He wanted to come but his Mum asked him to drive her to get some Lunar New Year's goods.At least I still have Fiona to help.Will ask Fen to come along too if she wants.Off to Audition now!!

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Was late for work again, as ususl, lucky that b***h is not working.Was in quite a happy mood today, as there's no idiots who spoil my day like always.I'm not sure whether there is, not everyday is sunday.

I only worked for 4 hrs today, have to rush home to finish up the gate, which is my Dad and my hard work.Touch up here and there, and, TA-DA!! It's done!! Now only left with my bedroom and half of the living room.So peeps, free to come my house after Lunar New Year to look at my "new" house!!

I'm glad we talked today.Ya, as I was saying, feel free to ask me anything you find trouble in, I 'm most happy to help.You know he listens to me but not you? That's because he thinks that I know about you more than he does, and he knows that you will tell me everything and I will understand, so....I can be the messenger for you guys.But...$50 for each message sent, I'm not for free okay!! (Just Kidding) I'm happy too when I see you guys happy. (:

He said that I'm more matured nowadays, which I don't think so? I'm still the same old Li Hia, ha!! But I admit that I'm in better control of my temper now, anger management I should say.

Have to go buy rollers tomorrow, make painting easier for me, have to wake up in the morning, so I should be off to sleep now.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Didn't go to work today, as I'm feeling very tired.Playing Audition for several nights and ended up not enough sleep.So to like some how "recover" back my sleep for the past few days I ended up sleeping till 7pm today.Pro huh?! The aftermath, not feeling sleepy now and gotta sleep late again.Gosh.

Quarrelled with him on the phone yesterday, just because I'm so addicted to Audition nowadays and have been neglecting my sleep and him.Got angry but to think back, what he said was true.I've never felt so tired since I started Audition, and couldn't spend quality time with him, which may leads to our relationship ended up being cold to each other, and breaking up has to be the best solution.I don't want to leave him, and I don't want him to leave me.

I promise to you that I won't get so addicted to playing online games and take care of my own health.

Saw her blog just now.She's scared of talking to me? I don't understand.I don't gobble people up!!

I'm not a hard-to-get-along person to begin with, and I treasure my friends, especially you, your sister, Fen and Yani.You guys confided your problems to me and I will try my best to help you guys when it's within my limits.Please don't be afraid, I will still accept you back and you are still free to contact me whenever you are in need of help.Don't be afraid to talk to me, I don't have bad breath, just for your reminder.Ha!! I know you don't have much friends and your school friends definitely can't be of any use, so......please, find me when you are in trouble.

I still treat you as my sister.As for F, I can try to talk to him for you if you can't get your message into his head.I can some sort feels that he actually listens to me.

Random note:
I just finished painting my gate with my Dad.We painted for like 2 hours and I'm still not very happy with it(I'm a perfectionist, although nothing in this world is perfect).Gotta paint it when I'm off.So who is so kind-hearted to help me with it? Ha!! Got to finish it before the Lunar New Year as it's just round the corner.Still have to paint the whole house, violet, and my room, baby blue.Big project!!

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Didn't manage to blog yesterday, I lend my beloved Vodafone to Fen.Cause she would staying in hospital for her OSA and needed some entertainment there.She did loads of test and find out that her's is not just OSA, but other illness.Hope nothing will happen to her.Or else who else will dote on me so much? Oops.Ha!!

Went to MOE with Fen yesterday and joined this year's JAE.Opted for Nursing course at Ngee Ann Poly and Nanyang Poly.Hope that I could get in either one.I wanted so much to study now.I hated working, I have to stand the tiredness and all the nonsense from the people at store.There's too much politics in the adult world and I don't think that I'm ready and matured enough yet to defence myself from being "chopped off".The society now is so scary and now I wished even harder that time would stop and I want to stop growing up and live under the care of my loving parents.They would protect me from falling down and picked me up whenever I fall.

Time, please stop.

That b***h scolded me again today, first for being late and secondly, she caught me for drinking MacCafe drink.She really has a problem with me.Am I such a bad girl in her impression? Or my work attitude really doesn't meet up to her standard? I've worked very hard for this store and always tried my best to help them whenever I can.Why can't they just appreciate? Maybe to them I'm just being nosy, meddling with their things which I shouldn't.

It's okay, I won't stay there for long too.Scold me, b***h, before I leave this store and you have no more chance to scold anymore.

She came down to store today but we never exchanged words.I decided that she didn't see me that's why she never come and talk to me, just to make myself happy.I don't understand why I've reacted like that ever since they got together.She seems to be over him and our topic for the day sure to be him and her.I don't even think she needs me now, as her elder sister who can be there and help her whenever she needs help.

Stop meddling with other people's affair and mine your own business.

He saw it and told me that he felt like having a break up.But we just can't let each other go.I've alreaady assured him that it won't happen again but he just won't trust me.I understand that once trust is broken, there's nothing you can do to get it fixed back.I want back his trust again, I really do.Sometimes I really don't know what he's thinking and sometimes I will get the wrong idea of the whole thing and we'll end up having cold war with each other.I don't want it to be like that.

Hopes that everything will turn out fine when I wake up tomorrow.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

I only slept for 3 hrs today, a big breakthrough to the fact that I could sustain my energy till now.Felt so damn sleepy when I'm working, kept ranting that I want to punch out at 4.30pm.

As usual, I was late and same like a routine, got scolded by that stupid b***h again.

I won't work morning for no reasons, as you know, I hated to wake up in the morning, so obviously, I had something to do, cause it's Yani's birthday today!! So they waited at Plaza Sing for me to punch out and met up with Hui Fen.Then went to eat kopitiam(which Sharon Yap hated actually) and talked about "her" being set up by "hantu hitam".Was quite shocked when I heard a different version from mine, and this version came out from "her" mouth.F**king "hantu hitam".He's so evil!!

But much much more better than that b***h.

Anyway, we walked around and we decided to go somewhere else since Hui Fen is driving.Drived down to Bishan Junction 8.I remembered that birthdays are not birthdays when there's no cake, and all of us was so-called bankrupt so I tot that if we couldn't buy her a cake so I thought of buying her "a slice" of cake instead.

So we secretly bought a cake at Cafe Cartel, Bitter Chocolate Fudge Cake.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Feeling so tired now, both body and emotional.Having problems here and there made me so tired that I just want to fall asleep forever, no need to care about what's happening around me.

Friends.One having a problem which she cannot help herself and I just can't stop myself for helping her, seeing her looking so lost and helpless.One having problems with me and felt hurt by my words.

Gosh.

What's happening to me? Am I too busybody or God is puninshing me for all the bad things I've done? Why does my friends have problems either with me or themselves? I don't know.

I've been neglecting him this few days and I'm sorry about it okay, I promised to pay more attention to you when everything's settled.

Off to play audition now, just to relax myself.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

It's been a long time since I blogged, been too tired and busy to blog.Been working and slacking at the same time.And playing audition!!

During these days, something grave happen to "A" and I've been helping "A" along with "B".She can considered naive but there's under some circumstances that she has no choice but to do it.A phone call and her life changed since then.In these situations she has no choice but to accept it and face the music that she at first had composed herslf.We met up with her and tried to understand her situation, told her the cruel truths of life and made her realised that we sincerely wants to help her.

From her story, I realised that one cannot live without having friends.They may not be perfect and know exactly what you want, but at least they could be your shoulder to cry on and a listening ear.But only best friends who treasure you alot would help you in times of needs and help with their very best, and sharing laughters together.Not everybody would like you but at least have the majority wanting to be your friend.There's only a faint line between friends that can have fun moments with you and friends who can really stand by you when you need help and wanting no returns.So who's the one who can have fun moments only and who can help you willingly with no regrets in your life? Think about it, peeps.

During these few days, I didn't really spend much time with him so I'm a bit guilty about it.Could see that he's not very happy about it cause I'm always busy caring about other people but not him.I'm sorry, not on purpose.I really loved him alot and hopes that he could understand me.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Everything seems so boring for me nowadays.Work and home everyday.And adding on to my boring mood, scolded by a woman who seems to have depression.

Imagine being scolded every single shift with your boss.

Gosh, feel like slapping her and skinning her alive.

She's like not happy with my work.Pin-point me and screwing me up every single shift I worked with her.Main store or cafe, she always has something to say.What the hell is wrong with her? Husband didn't give it to her I think.

Got scolded again today, for not answeing her calls in the morning until afternoon.Please, come on, who would put their phones on ringing mode when they are sleeping? Only idiots would do that, for somebody who needs huge load of sleeps would off silent of cause, not to disturb my beauty sleep.She's like pissed off for not answering her calls.

J: Why didn't you answer my calls? I've been calling you since morning!!
Me:I was sleeping.
J: Do you know that I don't have a beanie since morning? You're an adult, not a kid, can't you
just call back?
Me: I didn't know!! As if is my fault that you don't have a beanie!!
J: And why are you late?
Me: I was having a stomachache!!

Who asked them to be so stupid to excuse Ruben, knowing that the impact will be great when a beanie can't turn up? Can only blame on her low IQ.

Well, fucking bitch.

Sorry for the foul language, she made me say that.Blame her.

Random note:
Steph came to store today.Waited for me together with Yani and went to Heeren, HMV.Bought my long-searched-and-waited headsets.iLuv, costs me $34.95.Hopes that this would last longer than Onto headset, my previous one.Steph bought a Billabong bag, which costs her $69.90.Expensive!! But cool!! I helped her choose the colour, purple.Thank me Steph, muahahaha.Ah, don't mention it.(Sorry, I'm abit self-high)

Trained home with him today, laughing and joking along.He wore contact lenses today, I noticed that his eye lashes is similar to Shahran, long and looks like a girl's!! Nice!! I love his eye lashes!! I will put mascara on him one day, I mean it, and he has agreed.Waiting for that day when he officially becomes a gay!! I'm so mean!! Just kidding.If he becomes a gay I will kill myself, suicide.Lose to a guy, how lousy am I.Muahahaha.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

What are promises? What are appreciateness? Does people understand these two words? I don't know.And I don't understand.

Does promises really meant to be broken? How many promises does people made and broke them? I know I broke promises before but I'm trying my best not to.Does people try not to? I don't know.The feeling of breaking promises is just like a betrayal, telling you things that doesn't even exist in their dictionaries.Making a promise may be easy, breaking it is much more easier.People tends to go to the easier option.That's what a human being is made of.I don't know how many times people broke their promise but one thing I know, THE FEELING IS THE SAME, BETRAYAL.

Appreciate, appreciate and appreciate.That's what my parents thought me.Appreciate what people do for you and give it back to them the same way they treated you.I try my best to give people what they want and made it almost similar to what they always wanted but it always doesn't goes back the same way to me? Treat people the same way you want to be treated, ha!! WHAT A JOKE!!!

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Today's my birthday!! Officially 19 years old!! Last year of a teenager, feels old actually.I DON'T WANT TO TURN 20!! The older you are, the more responsibility you have to carry.I rather stay young forever and not grow up.Skinned knees heal faster than a broken heart.Impossible I know, huh?

Went to Malaysia and walked around with him today.I went to meet him at Singapore customs and first we went to City Square.After that, took his car and went to his house.His Mum's so cute!! She poured me a glass of water and I got quite touched(I know I'm silly but I'm easily satisfied okay?!).Tony was at home and he passed me the present that Steph bought for me, is a Billabong long pencilcase.Thanks Steph. (:

Pulled Tony out for lunch, after that drived him home again and he brought me to Jusco.Nothing to shop at there,big but nothing.Looks more lika a supermarket to me, No individual shops, all linked together, looks a bit weird to me.After drived down to Danga Bay, which I bought alot of things from there.He bought me a Adidas jacket, black with gold stripes.LOVE IT!! Bought for me as a birthday gift.

We at outside Danga Bay slacking.Actually what he planned was to come my house and cook pasta for me and after catch a movie before picking up my other present.But I spoiled his plans for suggesting to ask him bring me around his territory.I even saw all the ingredients for the pasta at his house.Sorry DD.


Bicycles for rent at Danga Bay.Danga Bay is so called like our East Coast Park.Pubs, sea, theme parks and a circus there.I even saw an elephant walking pass just like that on the road when he's driving!! Wanted to take a photo but I don't dare, scared that it will tramp on me!! This bicycle looks unique so I took a photo of it.

Loads Of "aNtZ"

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Today's the eve of my birthday!! Did nithing much today, went to watch "Yes Man" with my auntie at yishun.Went Northpoint's Swensens to have our lunch, after that watched movie at 7.10pm, ended at 9.10pm.A good show, you guys should watch it.

When I reached home Xiao Fang called me, wanting to meet me to celebrate my birthday.After meeting up with Cai Xia went Sun Plaza to meet Xiao Fang, Jess, Ying Si and Li Han.They bought a Tiramisu cake for me.First time eating it, not a good cake, but I still appreciate their gift for me. (:


i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Went out with Fen today.She wanted to celebrate my birthday with me.Supposed to celebrate with them but they seems uninterested.Abit disappointed though, I came to a conclusion, no use treating people so nice, you won't get appreciated.All you will get are just all disappointments.

Back to the topic.We drove around looking for food so we finally settled for a shop along Upper Thomson Road and ate our dinner.After that went Plaza Sing, wanted to catch a movie.But in the end it's too late cause we accompanied Yani to wait for Tony.And guess what? Yani bought me a bear from Build-A-Bear workshop!! I'm so touched!! I've wanted it for so long!! Finally got it!! But I'm supposed to wait till the clock strikes 5th Jan midnight then I could see what's inside!! So excited.I will behave.Fen bought me a thumbdrive as I would need it when I start school later this year.Useful.Thanks Fen. (:

Loads of "aNtZ"

Li Hia

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Today I went out with my secondary school's friends, to celebrate my birthday in advance, as I'm not free on the exact.Yu Wen, Brenda, Bin Pei, Cynthia, Fang Ru and Janet met up at City Link mall and I'm the last to reach, overslept, ha!! When I reached they covered my eyes and made me pin a big pink flower on my shirt!! So ugly!! And I'm supposed to pin it all the time spend with them!! OMG!! So embarassing!! So I kept on playing with the flower on my hand instead of pinning it on my shirt!! After everybody met up we went to Hong Kong Cafe and have our dinner, after which we made our way to a pub at Odeon Tower, The Loof.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥

Today's the first day of 2009, but I don't see any difference in it?

I was late for work today, supposed to punch in at 2.30 but I punched in at 3, too tired to work.I find myself dragging myself to work everyday now.The damn store is still so hot with the air-con unfixed and with Eugene gone.What is left in our store is all those people whom I don't quite enjoy working with.Tonyis also leaving on 7th Jan as he's going to start studying soon.Sick and tired of serving for MacDonald's.4 years of service and I think I'm quite done with it.

I feel so empty nowadays, feels that something is lacking in my empty heart.I feels like the whole world is only left with me alone to fend for myself, alone in the dark, can't see my fingers when I reach out my hand.Why am I feeling that way? I don't know.People surrounding are always in pairs but I'm alone, nobody who cares a damn about me.Abit pessimistic huh?

Tomorrow I'm celebrating my birthday in advance with my sceondary school's clan.Going dinner and pubbing after that.Hopes that it will be fun like 2008.

i love walking in the rain, so nobody knows that i'm crying..♥